Weâve all seen the bumper-sticker phrase, âbe yourself,â but why is this saying so common? Letâs examine the core truth:
Why should you be yourself?Â
Itâs easy
To be yourself, all you have to do is be authentic to who you are. Every person has something that they are uniquely good at. Find that thing. I will never be as good at being you as you are. You will never be as good at being me as I am. In school, we are trained to do whatever the lesson plan says we should do. True gains are achieved when you pursue your genuine intellectual curiosities.Â
What if you do not know who you are?Â
Reflect on your life, the things you derive true joy from, and the things you are naturally talented at. Where have you gone above and beyond when nobody was watching? Thatâs where your innate self lies. For example, I remember being fascinated by the water cycle in elementary school⊠so youâre telling me this lake on the ground turns into rain?
I was raised in a low-income immigrant household, but every morning I rode the bus to a wealthy school (#ThankYouFinancialAid) filled with people with entirely different backgrounds than me. I always tried to change who I was around different people to get them to like me. While it worked on the surface, developing deep relationships with people was difficult. This chameleon ability is helpful in work and school, but it only garners acquaintances. Deep down, I was scared that people would reject me, but rejection is the greatest gift you can receive. You want to filter out the noise to focus on what/who matters.Â
It may be painful in the short-term, but long-term gainz are king
At the beginning of college, I tried to be someone I was not. I saw college as a chance to reinvent myself and played the popularity game. Eventually, I was surrounded by people who were doing the same thing or people who didnât vibe with me. It was exhausting! Once I embraced my true nature as a loving, nerdy guy, I was truly free. While it sucked at first when artificial relationships fell away, my core group of friends stuck around. Life has been simpler ever since.Â
Watch: Frank Ocean - Be Yourself
The truth will save your time
The people you have been showing a facade to may not want to be in your life anymore. As you break into your authentic self, you will lose friends, partners, and jobs. Thatâs good. Why? The people in your life are people who like you for who you are.